I am still in shock this morning…I amazed myself last night!
Let me tell you the story:
We are having a big family reunion this weekend. The first in a very long time. We are going to have a silent auction to recover costs and have some funds for the next reunion. For things like paper plates, prizes, etc.
Well, of course, I had planned to have some sort of quilt for the auction. I am well known in the family as a quilter and I thought it would be nice for me to have a quilt for someone to buy.
Again, of course, those that know me, know that I did not get one finished. Not even started! Not surprising, it’s been yet another busy spring!
Anyway, my aunt called me from my Gramma’s house yesterday and needed some help with a quilted table runner she is making for this silent auction. I love to help fellow quilters, so I rushed over after work and helped her out. I so love quilting and it has been so long! I got the bug again and wanted to do some of my own quilting when I got home.
After supper, I went down to my “quilting corner” and immediately started running plans through my head of what I could “whip up” for this weekend’s reunion. Did I mention that it’s THIS weekend? Like 4 days from now!?? I spent about 20 minutes ACTUALLY contemplating getting something done in 4 days! I AM COMPLETELY INSANE!! I did have myself going! I really was going to attempt this crazy idea! I rummaged around, a million schemes going through my head – I could spend this many hours every day, I could make something this simple, I could make something this size, etc. etc. etc.!!!
A year ago, the Shawna I knew would have actually attempted this. I would have stayed up until 2 a.m. every night frantically getting something put together. I would have been completely stressed out, not enjoying quilting the project in the first place! Hating something that I LOVE to do! I would have made a million mistakes because of being tired, thus taking me that much longer. I wouldn’t have enjoyed the weekend’s reunion because I would have been exhausted from trying to complete the project in time! A year ago, I was a different person.
Now, the Shawna I know is trying (and sometimes succeeding) to set REALISTIC goals! I am trying so hard to be more sane! I kicked myself in the butt last night and made myself realize that it is far more important for me to enjoy the weekend’s reunion than have one of my quilts there for everyone to “ooo and aaw” over. I realize that my family will enjoy my company much more than my quilts. No one is going to say, gee, how come Shawna didn’t make a quilt? And if they do say that, so what!? I don’t need to do absolutely everything, all the time!
I did sit down to quilt for about an hour. Just tinkered at one of my many projects. And you know what? I did NOT stress about getting anything done! I just enjoyed the hum of my machine and the intricacies of a project coming together. That is why I love quilting – relaxation and seeing little bits of fabric become something beautiful. Something that I MADE with MY own hands. That is what makes me happy. I can look forward to a weekend with my large family. I can ENJOY it. And I won’t have a quilt there, but I will have my family all around me; laughing, telling stories, curling up by the fire under one of my many quilts that I have made, and loved making!
That is what amazed me! I actually WAS sane last night! That was my “realistic moment”.
Now, the day is young – how many times can I be realistic today!!??